Happy 100th!

I'm baaaack. Laptop is fixed!

100

Today is my 100th post!!! It's hard to believe I started this blog one random morning during a graveyard shift and now I'm writing my 100th post. Thanks to everyone who follows this and knows I am not the relationship guru but still enjoys reading this anyway.

In honor of "anniversaries," let's talk about time.

Remember when you were in high school and you couldn't wait to make it to your 6 month anniversary with your boyfriend? Oh, man. Those were the days.

1 month anniversaries. 6 month anniversaries. 1 year anniversaries. Golden anniversaries.

Two years since you broke up with your boyfriend. Five months since he changed.

"When was the last time you hooked up with him?"
"Two weeks ago."

Time is this way we quantify our lives and our love. If you've been dating for two months, it's still new. Six months? In it's prime. A year? It's serious.

It's been a month since you hooked up with him? Good job (well, if he sucks.)

This is my 100th post? Wow, I must really enjoy loving freely.

Time is this entity that's constantly slipping through our hands. We never have enough of it. And, as important as time is, sometimes we have to realize we can't ever quantify our lives and our love with time. Some one month relationships have more love than 20 year marriages. Some people can't get over a breakup after 5 years, some people only take 5 days. We all heal differently, we all live differently, we all love differently.

Here's to the next 100.

Love freely,
tY

Destruction: Love, lust, and like.

Not a poem. Random string of thoughts.

People themselves are not destructive.
They don't come along hoping to destroy our lives or break our hearts or manipulate us.
Feelings and emotions are where the destruction comes into play.
The time we devote to these people
and the ways in which we fall for them
bring out the ugliness that wasn't there in the beginning.
At the end of relationships or relationwhatevers we always put the blame on the person.
And sometimes it's fair.
But, sometimes it's not.
Maybe we should take some of the responsibility for our actions
our reactions
and most importantly, our feelings.
Maybe we should realize that sometimes when we get in too deep
we haven't just dug a hole
we've fallen into an abyss
and maybe sometimes we just have to realize that's what love, lust, like, and all of the above do.
Because sometimes I think "like" and "lust" are just duller, more elementary, watered down versions of love.
Their "ike" and "ust" never turn into "ove"
but the emotions behind them are still all encompassing
so powerful that we become powerless
or maybe "ike" and "ust" are just ways to deny that we actually love someone
words that society deems more fit because love is scary
and everyone knows it.

Love freely,
tY

The Friday night

Note: Laptop is dead as a door knob. I am blogging right now from the convenience of my wonderful desktop at home but posts might not be as consistent this week.

On to The Friday night.

How many weekend nights have you spent curled up next to your boyfriend or significant other or hookup doing absolutely nothing? You know, watching a movie or just talking. Not going out. Just think about it.

Now, how many weekend nights have you spent just chilling...alone?

More or less, I chose to spend my Friday night by myself with a Sex and the City DVD, Noodles and Company, and my journal. My sister and I laughed about it the next day, calling me a loser.

But, as I walked up the steps to my dorm last Friday, I saw a couple strolling hand in hand, probably preparing to do the same thing I did. Nothing. Except they were doing nothing...together.

Here's the thing. When couples spend nights together doing pretty mindless activities, we think it's cute. Because it is. Being able to spend pure downtime with another human being is quite a gift. But, when we spend downtime by ourselves, we don't think it's that cute. Actually, we think it's kind of pathetic as if we couldn't find someone else to spend time with or our plans just fell through.

Of course I don't agree with that notion and I would bet most people don't. No one wants to spend every night of every weekend by themselves. Therein lies a social problem. But choosing to spend a night by yourself, even electing to spend a night alone with a movie and some ice cream over going out with friends or hanging out with your boyfriend, is actually a bit healthy. Everyone needs a minute to hear their own thoughts and just enjoy being alone. The inability to do such a thing is actually when you have the problem.

So, next time you spend your Friday or Saturday night curled up with a good movie and some fattening food, remember the only thing you "lost" is a couple of dollars at Blockbuster.

Love freely,
tY

Without you

I didn't think I could make it without you

because at one point in life everything I did was about you

but through some strange string of events

God gave me a gift and it was strength he sent

and everyday, every day

I'm doing it without you

Love freely,

tY

Thoughts

In life, we regret the things we didn't do more than the things we did.

In lust, like, and sometimes love, we regret the things we did more than the things we didn't do.

Through it all, everything happens for a reason.

Love freely,
tY

Outbursts

I wonder if Kanye West cuts off Amber Rose when she's speaking, too.

Love freely,
tY

Random sentiments today.

First off, yesterday was my first REAL wedding. And, by real I mean a) ceremony b) reception (woo, line dances!) c) i know and love the bride well enough that I wasn't interacting with people who I didn't really know and having to be cordial and awkward. And, um, it was awesome. I like weddings. I like witnessing love. That's all.

On to my post.

Decisions about love, like, and lust are all tough. So I guess this post is going to completely invalidate me as a blogger. Oh, darn. Guess I need to find another gig.

My point is no matter how much advice you get from other people, at the end of the day, your decisions are yours to make. You have to do what works for you, what makes you happy, and what will be healthy and good for you. Unfortunately, it's usually hard to make a decision that meets all of the aforementioned criteria.

To add a random point, I also believe in karma. If you do not right your wrongs yourself, or make hard but smart choices, if you choose to not be dishonest or not disclose complete truths, life has a way of doing it for you. And, life's way is usually a lot more unforgiving.

:Wink: (you know who you are)

Love freely,
tY