Admissions counselor

The first step to recovery is admission, no?

I haven't spent much time in rehab (and by much time, I mean any), but I think that's right.

I would also argue that the first step to love (or something like it) is admission.

Talking to my friends and people my age about relationships and hookups, I've learned that people in my generation have a hard time admitting their feelings. We hail from a generation that prides itself on instaneous everything: hookups, communication, etc. We are so busy and we are moving so quickly that stopping to admit we actually care about another human being is often times frowned upon and overrated.

Also, many times people chalk their lack of feelings up to past hurt. It feels as though everyone is bitter and has been scorned and scarred by ex-lovers. Meanwhile, we're all between 18-22 years old and don't realize that life is going to throw much more our way.

And, sure, I agree that sometimes admitting feelings to another person is the verbal equivalent of shooting oneself in the foot. Without the proper motives, telling your best friend who you used to play in the sandbox with that you are madly in love with him could completely demolish a perfect friendship. But, what about just admitting feelings to yourself?

Usually, when we think we're fooling everyone else around us into believing that we could care less about someone, we are only fooling ourselves. The moment you admit to yourself that you actually do care about that guy or you do still have feelings for your ex, you will feel so much better and so much more liberated. You aren't any less strong or any less of a person for shedding that icy exterior and admitting that you have a heart.

Feelings don't always have to result in an outcome such as a relationship or reciprocation. Perhaps that is where we make the biggest mistake--thinking that just because we love someone, we need to date them or they must feel the exact same way. Sure, when that happens, it is beautiful.

But, sometimes, you just have to feel and be OK with that.


Love freely,
tY