American advisor Anthony Robbins says: "“Why do people persist in a dissatisfying relationship, unwilling either to work toward solutions or end it and move on? It's because they know changing will lead to the unknown, and most people believe that the unknown will be much more painful than what they're already experiencing.”
People fear the unknown. Welcome to human nature 101. So, often times, people continue to maintain ties with their ex that blur the lines between dating and just being friends. Not only is this a point of comfort, but it can also provide a false hope that at some point, the relationship will work again. If the relationship doesn't go through reincarnation, eventually, one person (or both people) have that moment where they realize that the last shot they gave it was just that: the last shot.
That moment of realization could qualify as being far worse than the actual break up point because heartbreak forces us to be hopeful and think "well, maybe, just maybe, things will work at, just not at this point," but this moment forces you to face reality which is typically very hard to do in a relationship. People always want to believe there are gray areas in a relationship when really, things are usually just plain black and white.
In the end, the moment of realization is a vital step in getting over the relationship and discontinuing destructive behavior. It's also a huge step in returning to life as a legitimately single person. This isn't an unbearable fate; relationships are about the the twists and turns, not necessarily about finding a happy ending all the time.
Clean breaks in any relationship are rare. Even if they exist immediately after the relationship ends, it's tempting to go back to that old flame simply because of comfort. But, perhaps, the moment when you realize that things are over for good is the best and most empowering moment of all.
Love freely,
tY
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